A Certain Romance
by plasticineking
Summary: "I don't love you." - "But you could." He finished for her. - "Yeah... I really, really could. Fall stupidly in love with you." McCoy/Uhura fic with mentions of Kirk/Spock.


**A Certain Romance**

Leonard McCoy was always aware of everything going on around him, the people, noises, smells, touches, even when his own mind was filled with the haze of alcohol he was aware. He sat in a corner booth, leaning back into the comfort of the chairs and looking around the bar. There were a few people that were on shore leave with him, obvious by their uniform, but most were anonymous people enjoying themselves and the sight of the uniformed officers around them. In fact, if he was anyone else, he didn't doubt that he would've completely missed her at the bar.

There was no secret about the recent – well, three months ago – and rather public break-up of Spock and Uhura. Mostly because it was public. Spock's mother, God rest her soul, obviously never had the 'how to not break-up with someone' talk with her son, so when he walked across the bridge towards her beaconing smile and spoke in a cool voice the various problems he found in their relationship, personal things like how she had a high libido and was insatiable and so on, it was no shock – to the non-Vulcans – that Uhura was pissed. Although, being the cool, calm collected woman she was, not a tear was shed during his explanation, not a voice was raised, she just nodded her head swiftly said 'Okay,' and turned to her console, but the fire in her shining eyes told those who were aware – like McCoy – that she was anything but.

McCoy knew he never had the pleasure, before that night, to witness Uhura in terran clothing. Sure he'd seen her in her skirts, and _briefly _noted that she had okay legs... in the jeans, however, they looked like they went for miles. Those paired with her heals of some make he didn't care, and _that _top half of her. A cream partly see-through shirt tucked into her jeans giving her an elegance that was only increased by her hair, down and wavy. He didn't know Uhura well, not really, but he knew she wasn't a woman that would go to a bar to find someone to take home for the night, he just hoped she was aware, like he was, that looking like that she was going to get pestered all night. He almost got up to walk to her, some sort of chivalry, until he saw her face, it was void of emotion, much unlike her normal look and that froze him. He ordered another whiskey and kept his eyes on her.

–

McCoy hadn't loved many women, but when he did love he fell deep and hard and normally a lot more than the woman he fell for. He understood as well as anything the turmoil's of a broken heart, and as the night grew on and Uhura went onto her sixth whiskey of the night, he knew _exactly _what she was doing. The term 'drowning your sorrows' was something that would come as McCoy's tagline a few years ago, in spite of knowing it was no good. Now he had two options, he could go to Uhura, distract her from the drinks and make her see sense, or he could join her.

As his feet got up and walked to the bar, he ordered another whiskey for himself and one for her, she had barely glanced at him before a half hearted 'you don't have to', exited her lips.

"If I only did what I had to do, I'd have lived a much happier life." He replied, with a scowl, pushing the whiskey to her.

"A happy McCoy, that's something I'd kill to see."

"Pot, kettle, black." He replied swiftly, before taking a seat and turning to her, not caring that she didn't look back.

"It won't get better, startin' a romance with a bottle of Jack." He informed her, ignoring her snort, "I should know. You don't get out of a divorce without a few lost nights, and some scars."

"McCoy, no offence but you've got no idea," She sighed, shifting so she could look at him.

"Hey, sweetheart, so your Vulcan boyfriend dumped you in front of all your friends... I..." He paused, "Actually, you know? It does suck. I can't help you, I'm not here to help you..."

"Is that what you say to your patients?" She butted in, ignored.

"I'm here to join you." He ended his speech, his scowl deepening. She nodded and knocked back the whiskey he gave her, pointing at the bar for another two. There was a silence as McCoy frowned at her. He could see by the look on her face she was trying to say something, trying to form some words, and after almost fifteen minutes of silence between them she spoke.

"He asked me to dinner tonight." She smiled, "I accepted easily, of course I did. I'm not better than the girls my mother raised me not to be. It took all my strength not to run to meet him... Did you know?" She asked him, and of course he did, and for the first time he cursed himself and his senses.

"Yea' kid, I... sort of knew." He finished lamely, frowning even more at the sigh that left her lips.

"It makes me sick. Not because of who it was, but because Kirk helped me. He made me feel better. Told me that I was worth more. He fed me these... stupid damn lies because he was fucking Spock all along."

"It wasn't lies," McCoy said after a beat, "_You _are better than the both of them. Hell you're better than me because I saw the damn signs and I didn't do anything. M'sorry, kid. This is the same reason I only trust the drink. Any pain that inflicts on you, is your fault as yours alone." Uhura nodded, still not a tear fell, he had a feeling she'd done enough of that in private.

"I went to the restaurant, and I just saw them talking. I knew. I knew before I walked up to them, before they sat with me and told me. I could see the look in Spock's eyes that I only saw once or twice with me. I didn't make a scene, I just sat and told them I was happy for them. Would you believe me if I said I am? I hadn't loved Spock long before he embarrassed me that day on the bridge. I loved his company and his friendship that he allowed me to see daily when we were together, but I didn't love him. I just felt the loss of... what... my best friend? My best friend the Vulcan that doesn't know that it's not okay to cheat on someone, and it's not decent to break up with someone in front of everyone." There was a blush on her cheeks as she finished, taking a sip of her drink.

"The only reason I knew was because I stopped seeing Jim." McCoy stated, before quickly correcting as Uhura choked on her drink, "I mean, he stopped coming over for drinks, dammit. We weren't... We never. Hell before Spock I thought Jim was ladies only kind of guy."

"Yeah?" She asked rhetorically, turning to face the bar once more, "Didn't we all?"

–

The night grew on, and the bar slightly emptied, leaving some various star fleet officers around, not wanting to return to the ship just yet, including McCoy and Uhura, although that had something to do with the fact that if they tried to move it was likely one or both would fall. Laughter echoed through the bar Uhura grumbled.

"... The amount of attention I had after that was crazy! Everyone kept eyeing me up like I was some horny she-devil that can't go a week without having sex with something. It was awful. In the mess one morning, I hadn't put my hair up and people started wolf whistling at me."

"I happen to think a woman with a high libido's obviously not getting satisfied by her partner," McCoy stated matter of factly.

"Hey, Spock was a...gre...oka... Spock was fine at the sex." She scoffed.

"_The _sex. You aren't the only ones doin' it, it's just sex."

"Oh yeah, who's the lucky lady? Hell... or man, I'm not willing to rule anything out these days."

"No no-one. Chapel tried to ask me for a date a few weeks back, I know where that woman's hands have been and trust me..." He shuddered. There was a large silence as Uhura looked around the bar.

"Leonard McCoy. CMO of the Starship Enterprise. Gorgeous, with an _amazing _accent, a little rough around the edges, but who doesn't like a bit of rough?" She winked at him, ignoring his shocked expression, "Are you seriously leading me to believe that you aren't really snatched up, that that ex-wife of yours isn't kicking herself right now?"

"You better believe it, Uhura." He half grumbled, "Nobody wants this bag of bones, and I don't blame them."

"Mm. For a ship that holds so many geniuses, it's sure filled with idiots." Her reply was simple, and as she got up and walked to the door, only stopping to motion for him to follow, and as he finished his drink and paid, following her swiftly, he wondered if he fell into that category himself?

–

It's easy to think of having sex as just that. Sex. Nameless women, and men often meet on nights out and end doing an act that used to, many moons ago, be saved for the night of their marriage. McCoy wasn't innocent, he'd slept with women before his ex-wife, and hell, he slept with more nameless ones afterwards too, but he knew this wasn't Uhura. This wasn't the woman he knew, the one he respected was going to do something she'd regret, and he wasn't sure, as he followed her through the streets, if he was strong enough to stop her.

"I don't want to have sex with you," She spoke into the cold night air, not stopping her pace to look back at him. He felt relief mixed with damn right awkwardness.

"Okay." He replied easily, a blush on his cheeks he was thankful she couldn't see.

"You know, you've got a great smile." She said, confusing him greatly, "I just remembered the first time you stopped being the, uh, alcoholic-like guy with women issues, and you and Kirk came into the mess hall, and you were smiling. It was nice."

"... Thanks." For some reason he continued to follow her, through his confusion and alcohol induced hazed, he knew that she was leading up to something.

"Those cadet uniforms...Mm. I may have been like a lost puppy following after a Commander, but I noticed you. Blue may be your colour, but I wouldn't say that red wasn't either." She stopped suddenly turning around to face him, he jumped back, the grin as he listened to her speak falling slowly off his face.

"Uhura... Pardon me for not catching on, but..."

"I want you." She said simply.

"In... what?" He mumbled out. A shock rocking through him.

"You love Kirk." It was a statement that left no room for McCoy to argue... mostly because it was true. "I don't know whether it's the same way I used to love Spock, or the way I love him now, but I know that you're feeling the pain like I am. I also know that you love old movies, and that you ring your daughter every other night before going out for lunch with Kirk and that you can't understand why more people don't have old age cars, and you still get fascinated by space... I know you. I know that you didn't notice me in any way until tonight. I know that you have a love hate relationship with broken things. You're broken. I'm broken." She stepped forward, and it finally clicked. She knew he'd be there tonight, she had planned to come here all along.

"You were gunna tell him to shove off." His statement was as bold as the one she made moments earlier. She nodded. "Why?"

"Two months before Spock and I split, you were talking to your daughter in your office, about one day taking her to the stars... Do you remember?"

"Yea'... Of course" His voice caught, his eyes searched her face.

"I came to sickbay to meet Christine, and I heard your laugh..." She seemed unsure. "It was... I don't know if you'll make fun of me for this, but it was beautiful, and easy. It was like second nature for you and I hated that you didn't do it for anyone else." She turned away from him, walked to a bench nearby, he followed... Of course he followed. Sitting with enough distance that he could turn to watch her.

"Nyota." He tried her name on his tongue. Her head shot up and looked at him, a laugh escaping her lips.

"I don't know whether it's your accent or... But..." She laughed some more, and he couldn't help but smile. "I don't love you."

"But you could." He finished for her.

"Yeah... I really, really could. Fall stupidly in love with you." She shook her head, "But you couldn't." She ended with a sigh.

"Who said?" He was almost angry. "I don't have a clue what went on tonight. I don't know how I didn't notice you, noticing me. I don't know if you're in love with Spock, or just miss him or if you don't feel anything for him. I don't know if you're just saying a load of shit just to keep me here for another reason that... I don't know. But I do know that... I could love you just as much as you think you could love me." He huffed and turned away.

"The truth? … In a nutshell, I really do love Spock like a best friend, I had overheard that you were coming here tonight when you grumbled it to Kirk, I had absolutely no idea what was waiting for me when I went for dinner with Spock. I childishly thought I could embarrass him like he embarrassed me, that didn't work out. I dressed the way I dressed because I once heard you complain and I quote 'Dammit Jim, I'm sick to the back teeth of these short skirts that leave nothing to the imagination, I'm almost sure to hell that you had something to do with the design'. I really do think you're one of the most attractive men on the sh...no, just just on the ship, and I'm not just talking about that face of yours either, I'm talking about it all." She ended with a breath and he knew if he waited long enough, she'd start talking again.

"Okay well... that's good because... it is."

"Oh Doctor McCoy, you have such a way with words," She fanned herself dramatically, with a slight laugh. "I'm going home now, and by home I mean the apartment that I have here. Do you want to come with me?"

"If I say no?" He replied after a moment, watching her stand.

"If you say no, you say no. This night will have never happened." She walked off into the distance, and he watched her from the bench, shifting.

"I goddamn hate ultimatums." He grumbled to himself, turning his body away from the direction of her, his eyes turned to follow her form into the darkness, he groaned as he got up, half running to chase after her.

–

A/N: I love them, and I somehow managed to ship them with the some sort of passion of ten thousand burning suns and if I'm correct I don't think they even spoke to each other in both movies?


End file.
